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How Has Alcohol Affected Your Relationships?

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Does anyone have an experience having a relationship with someone who has a drinking problem?

mumstheword26
6 months ago
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Leannexxx

Yup I was knocked about too by my ex my advice run my friend has too she's been in rehab and doing great

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Lynibis

Ex husband was a total alcoholic and was in RN at the time so they put him in rehab. For 18 months after all was good but then he started again.

Most recent ended 13 years ago and he too was an alcoholic but a soppy, happy one whereas ex hubby was violent and abusive.

It is no wonder that I have no interest in men or relationships. Most don't seem able to have a social life without getting drunk. My sister's ex was same and another sister and her husband are both heavy drinkers.

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DeBunny

Close relatives

One would get aggressive and abusive, threw plates and smashed other things never usually at anyone though but did cause physical harm to themselves and verbally abusive. More of binging sessions.

Another the complete opposite, would be super out of it they couldn't speak or stand etc. But needed some form of alcohol to function as they would shake and not function properly otherwise. The doctor gave them medication to make them sick when they had alcohol to help discourage it but it had no affect on them. I have further heard that they were secretly verbally abusive and hid their horribleness to most us but was aimed at their partner. They nearly killed themselves unintentionally with alcoholism and cheated death two or three times.

The first person improved massively. The second person it was tough love, their partner after over 20+ years of not sleeping in the same room or being in an actual relationship decided to move away and eventually got a divorce. We had to stand our ground too and set boundaries. Even if they did end up killing themselves over it. Luckily we checked in on them regularly though, it took a fair bit of support from us but it took them to move and have multiple grandchildren to completely change their life around. They should probably never touch alcohol again and they have come very far, but their health will never be what it once was.

My partner and I gave up alcohol, not that we specifically needed to. Occasionally we have VERY low alcohol drinks. Just because we didn't see a need for it, it's expensive, it's usually calorific and the relationship with those above who were/are close to us is too traumatic. I don't particularly like alcohol or what it does to most people 😞

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mumstheword26

DeBunny thankyou so much for your in depth reply. Your honesty and truth of how it affects people is very real. Your comments will help others xx

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Pinkspirit

My ex was a secret vodka drinker well he thought he was secret about it, he was put on disciplinary action from two of he's jobs (project manager) for drinking in he's lunch breaks and colleagues smelling it on he's breath, was checked into rehab via bupa and work twice and manipulated he's time there with lies, was a habitual liar about anything & everything, would tear the shopping receipts up but l would get money off coupons in the post from said supermarkets so l knew what he was buying, say he was going to buy a paper / milk and be at least two hour and come back with neither then go and fall asleep in the garden, hide vodka in water bottles all over the garage & house 'once with a whole bottle leaking under the bed pillows, hide vodka in he's car and hide he's car keys hence never knowing where he had put them, deny deny deny when l confronted him with all the above. I finally walked away with just our dog when the alcohol poisoning, shakes, pins and needles and lack of balance still didn't make him admit to he's illness..as addiction is an illness

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mumstheword26

Pinkspirit you're so right in what you say. Alcoholics deny and hide even when confronted. Thankyou for your comments and honesty it will help others too xx

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Pinkspirit

mumstheword26 and Thank you for making this post/question. 😊

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HEDGEHOGS

I have a friend that's a alcholic and has been for over 30 years, she spends her life in and out of rehab, it's so, so sad, I always beleive she turned to drink due to an abusive childhood.

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martinlufc5637

Yes unfortunately, my brother is an alcoholic, it's destroyed his family, he now lives alone in a flat, it's a very sad story

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eyeballkerry

martinlufc5637 Sorry to here this. My brother also is an alcoholic and up for a drink driving charge this month.

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mumstheword26

martinlufc5637 it is sad when it's destroys family life. Being alone in a flat is probably the best thing even though it sounds harsh. It gets them to face themselves. It's the cause and effect isn't it. It not only affects the drinker it affects everyone around them. Drinkers can't see that it's not a solution it's the problem. Thankyou for your comments it will help others xx

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martinlufc5637

eyeballkerry he is constantly in trouble with the police, I have done my best to help him, treatment centres ect .his health is terrible too, he is my brother I love him no matter is what his condition is, and will always support him but it's been draining on me lately, I'm tredding the summer, last year was tough

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martinlufc5637

mumstheword26 yes it's effected everyone

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eyeballkerry

martinlufc5637 My brother used to live alone after his girlfriend left and not sure that was the start of the drinking. He now lives in the family home but just constantly lies.

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martinlufc5637

eyeballkerry yeah the lies are every day, emotional blackmail is another trate he uses, he blames everyone but himself, my wife doesn't want him at our home anymore

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eyeballkerry

martinlufc5637 It is an illness which needs help. But unfortunately they don’t want help or think they need it. My brother said he went to an AA meeting, thing is he only went once. He either never went but if he did, you don’t get cured on one meeting.

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jdible

Yes my ex used to drink so much then she turned nuts and always started to row she even beat me up a few times the number of times that police was called by other people in the end after trying to get her help I had to end our relationship

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mumstheword26

jdible that's the way it always happens. People try to help them but they don't see drink as the problem when it so is. I don't blame you for ending the relationship

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suevernon1968

I spent six weeks living with my cousin. I got her completely sober. I left for one night cos her dad was supposed to be going to see her and we always clashed. He didn’t bother turning up sadly she was found dead the next day by her neighbour with two empty vodka bottles. So so sad.

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mumstheword26

suevernon1968 yes it is sad when someone has passed away like that drinking heavily. Shocking find for the neighbour I bet.

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Pfs

I had a alcoholic friend when I was younger but he died about 20 years ago at the age off 38

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mumstheword26

It just shows the dangers of alcohol on people's lives, not just the drinker but people around them are affected too. Sorry for your loss. That was a young age to pass away x

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EmmaWright762

I understand Betty Ford have a ward just for insects that bit my parents when they were alive. The biting bugs are still in there trying to recover. My mother died from alcohol abuse and my father from cancer but loved his drink.

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