My Neighbour Has Asked Us to Be Quiet as Are Getting Married in Their Garden
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I have a neighbour next door but one who has been doing major renovations for the last 5 months and has disregarded all rules at avoiding noise disturbances during certain times. They did it all over every bank holiday including Easter making it unbearable to sit in the garden. Even with the doors and windows closed our home still vibrated in to the late evening 9:30pm.
They are now having a home wedding tomorrow and requested that we be quiet and avoid making too much noise even including the vacuum!! during the ceremony. They will be playing a live band in the garden up to about 11pm.
We haven’t made any objections as weddings can be very expensive (do hope it does finish by midnight though!!)
I however do think it’s a bit cheeky though to ask us to be quiet despite the noise we have endured and willing to accept the extra noise at the wedding.
They even asked whether we were willing to give up part of our drive! We don’t even know them, they’ve lived there for about 3 years and made no attempt to get to know anyone!
I welcome everyone’s thoughts and opinions
I would have the loudest music on lol and I'd make sure it was headbanging too why coz I'm that petty 
had loads of issues with the workmen in the shop downstairs and I've spoken to them and to be they was making fun off me so I had fun with gorilla glue 
Leannexxx I do need to mow the lawn, was just too hot today plus I am doing my vacuuming if it clashes so be it. They haven’t given me a time of the actual vows? No chance of using my drive, some might be a bit tipsy
Well, if they were courteous neighbours that you were on nodding terms with or great friends I would have no problem with this and would happily acquiesce. But given their last behaviour I can understand it would be difficult.
What I would do (and it's just my way) I would write a lengthy letter explaining that you feel rather put upon at being asked this favour when there was no courtesy or effort while doing their renovations. I would also add that their lack of neighbourliness over the years makes me wonder how they have the audacity to ask for such a favour. As to the drive can their guests not park a few streets away and other guests drive them to your house as I may need my drive.
I would end by saying, however, as I do like to be friendly and oblige my neighbours as you never know when you may need their help, I will go out for the day (if possible) and return at 11 when I trust you will not allow the music to continue after that time. Alternatively you can pay for my family to stay in a hotel with breakfast overnight. Sincerely yours etc.
Do you live in America? As far as I know British couples cannot marry in their own backyard, unless the law has changed since I left my job as a marriage registrar in 2011. Is it just the reception after the marriage elsewhere?
Lynibis really! It in the uk didn’t know that. Thanks so much for taking the time to give me some really good advice. I will update you on Sunday to let you know how things go 
I think they are actually having the full ceremony there. Gazebo Marquee are all up
️ jillylovesyou We're sorry to disappoint those of you who live in England and Wales – but you cannot legally get married in your garden. You have to register your marriage at a licensed venue; some of these venues are outdoors, but none of them are in people's gardens.
Well that is pretty clear. I have married folk in venues, register office, even hospital on deathbed but never in own home. I think it will happen one day though.
Lynibis oh well! I will be a snoop tomorrow to see if they leave to go somewhere in a wedding car to get wed! Obviously they have other reasons for wanting us to be quiet, they did seem to be referring to during the day time. Unless they are having a second non official service?? Who knows, be interested in finding out tomorrow! Watch this space 
jillylovesyou I had an idea it would come in at some stage as I retired in 2011 and they were thinking of it then. Mind you it doesn't make any difference to your problem with such indifferent neighbours. I must have hurriedly looked at some old info.
If they were that good neighbours J, they would have invited you to the night time do , which i assume is in the garden also
That would have been the first thing i would have done for a neighbour they are asking so many favours of
It would have been no skin off their noses and would have solved the problem of being too noisy if you were at the party
But the fact they didn't speaks volumes
jillylovesyou I think that night should be barbecue night for you , charcoal with plenty of sizzling fat and smoke
jillylovesyou Hope you enjoyed it J , i was only joking about having one on their day , you still have to be neighbours after, but it shows how people don't think , or just don't care
telmel ..
My partner's brother J & sister in law M have 4 allotment turned into land at the back if the home they live in..
J & M are involved with their church so when they used to have a BBQ on the land they invited their family, friends,church & neighbours, they turned the BBQ into a day that everyone enjoyed, they had Face Painting,;Bouncy Castle, Kareoke..
It was bring your own Alcohol but other drinks were available...
janphoenix51 That's sounds really nice J, just how neighbours should be , years ago you would contribute some food as well as a few bottles of beer or bottle of wine if you got an invitation to a barby
telmel ...Yes, if we are invited any where we bring what drinks we need & some food along too, that way the occasion doesn't leave the hosts with too much to sort which can be a headache as some people don't eat certain foods..
Are your neighbours a travellers? Don't let them use your drive as they may put tarmac on
SebK84 There's land owners (overseas) who had to pay for those people to get off his property (extortion no doubt), so yeah definitely do not let them if they are. The laws for "travelers" tend to be a double standard (we can't do this, but they can).
We saw what happened recently in Leeds.
Sound like my neighbors. Want everything there way, want you to live your life around them. Don't do it. It only makes things worse. Don't help in anyway like giving up your drive it's yours. If you want to vacuum do so there not going to hear it any way. If you want to play music do so. If you want to do any DIY do so. There have no right to control you. I was told by the council. I can't make excessive noise like when having work done before 8:00am or after 8:00pm. But in between you can do DIY. Good luck sounds like your going to need it!
KAW18 they did diy way past those hours and had an industrial digger! They will hear my vacuum it’s a shark and very very loud!!! Plus might be getting the karcher jet wash out as my windows need cleaning and that really does have some serious decibels
jillylovesyou 
Well these things have to be done. Can't really complain about keeping your house clean and tidy!
Yes it leads to really bad situations. I made the mistake when the neighbor in the downstairs flat moved in went along with everything she wanted but when it went too far I said no to something she wanted. She didn't like it so has now spread rumors around the whole area about things I've suppose to have done that I haven't done. I'm now hated by the whole area.
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oh thanks so much! 
It’s only one day and hopefully won’t bother you too much. However, I would carry on with normal routines like vacuuming or mowing. That’s your business not theirs. I would be reasonable though. Leave them be for their ceremony but the rest is your property and your life. I also probably wouldn’t give use of drive unless it’s really not going to be an issue for you. Best to keep friendly with neighbours if possible. I have noisy neighbours with construction works in the garden but it’s not all the time. I just think if I want to use noisy equipment too then they have to put up with that too.
I would agree to not create unnecessary noise (rather than 'being quiet' in my own home) but I wouldn't give up part of my driveway. I object somewhat to neighbours who make no contact until they want/need something from you 
When they came round to ask you could have said yes that’s no problem but do you mind observing the bank holiday building laws
jillylovesyou people like this are very annoying, they don’t care about your comfort etc but then want you to go out of your way to help them.
Don't get me started about neighbours, never had a problem where we've lived apart from the last few years where we have a neighbour that feels it's ok to dictate what we can an cannot do. Hopefully the wedding will finish at a decent time but if you feel the need to mow your lawn then go ahead and do it lol and pop a bit of music on and enjoy a nice smokey bbq .
jillylovesyou I love Andrea Bocelli . Here are some better ideas.
DIVORCE
Tainted love
Shot gun wedding
Dont do it
Love will tear us apart
That don’t impress me much
Love is a losing game
I still haven’t found what I’ve been looking for
Wow that's awful if they had been respectful with renovations you'd be willing to not make noise. They sound very entitled. I'd be telling them to jog on and tell them they had no respect when renovating their house so no chance
Jerseydrew they now have a portable loo block in the front garden!! Must be a lot of people coming!! It is going to be a very noisy next 12+ hours ahead 
They were vacuuming this morning outside at 7am!!! And it was loud
jillylovesyou do you know other neighbours round your way I'd soeak with them and see if they are annoyed by the noise
Jerseydrew problem is nobody wants to speak up! Not the first time we have had 2 gigs with live bands by the neighbour next to them in the last 2 years and both went on for the entire weekend! It’s so close now to them all arriving it’s too late to object anyway
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