Is It Fair to Say I Don't Want a Present?
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I asked someone what they would like for christmas, after she asked me what my children would like. She said she doesn't need anything so don't get her anything. I feel she would be upset if I didn't give her anything but have no idea what to get her was she being kind or unfair?
Sorry I’m confused by your post. Your friend said she doesn’t want anything. Why would she be upset if you didn’t give her anything?
Imnotcheap it seems you don’t know her that well then if you’re not sure if she meant it
Maybe just a small token gift if you’re worried, like a small box of chocolates, or if you like to bake then some biscuits or something?
snoogans888 its a family member. I really think she would be hurt if got her nothing
Imnotcheap I see. Is she close to your children? Perhaps a framed photo or other photo gift of them together would be nice?
Just a token something to show her that she's thought off and not forgotten .Regardless of what she says I fancy she's either testing the water and/or just being nice.
If she doesn't want anything then don't buy, I wouldn't, and I wouldn't feel bad about it at all
Imnotcheap if your fear she’s lonely then what about offering to take her out for a coffee and a cake? Time spent together will probably mean more to her than a gift.
snoogans888 she has mobility issues not sure she can walk that far, but thats a nice idea maybe I can give her an afernoon tea ticket to give her so we can go together just after christmas someting to look forward to.
Imnotcheap yeah it’s always nice to have something to look forward to. You can also get afternoon tea delivered to your home. I’ve used Piglets Pantry a few times.
Jackscot unfortunately she doesn't like gift sets and can't get out to spend money
I always tell people i don’t want anything for Christmas/birthdays as well but they seem to take it in a funny way.
She probably asked you not to get her anything so she does not need to reciprocate, which is absolutely understandable, unless she is minted! If she has children buy for hers if she is buying for yours. It might have been the ideal time to respond with a kindly, 'Oh ok, shall we not do presents for each other this year, just buy for the kids?'
This is still best if she has no kids as she is the one asking you not to buy for her, let yourself off the hook as she may not afford to buy for you if you buy for her.
Lynibis she buys early so will already have mine. She doesn't have any children
I don’t have kids. I buy presents for everyone else’s children as well as the adults. It’s spending more on them than they would on me. But it’s my choice what I spend. So maybe the kids are enough to buy for. It would make her feel she has to buy something for you as well and may not be able to. If you really want to give something a box of chocs is sufficient or maybe a plant/flowers for home if she can’t get out much.
How about doing a food hamper for her? we do one for the old chap next door stuff like tins of food and tea bags, coffee stuff like that
I don't see any unfairness in this. I think take her word for it but perhaps take her out somewhere to enjoy time together
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